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  • Prioritising your mental health in 2024

    1. Digital Detox: Designate specific times each day to disconnect from screens, social media, and emails. Embrace offline activities that promote relaxation and mindfulness, fostering a healthier relationship with technology. 2. Physical Activity Integration: Infuse your routine with regular exercise, even if it's just a short daily walk. Physical activity has proven benefits for mental health, releasing endorphins and reducing stress. Choose activities you enjoy tomake it sustainable. 3. Mindful Eating: Pay attention to your eating habits, focusing on nutritious and balanced meals. Mindful eating not only supports physical health but also contributes to a positive mental state. Be conscious of what you consume and how it makes you feel. 4. Establish Boundaries: Set clear boundaries in personal and professional life to prevent burnout. Learn to say no when necessary and prioritize activities that align with your well-being, fostering a healthy work-life balance. 5. Therapeutic Practices: Incorporate therapeutic practices such as meditation, journaling, or deep breathing exercises into your daily routine. These activities can help manage stress, enhance self-awareness, and contribute to overall mental resilience in the year ahead. Image by pch.vector on Freepik

  • Part 2 - Five tips to manage those festive triggers - by Karen Holmes

    Tip #3 Try not to re-enact old roles When you’re back in the family dynamic, it is hard not to succumb to those old patterns. If you find yourself back in an old role that you didn’t particularly enjoy the first time round or when you were younger, try to change the pattern. Families are notorious for scape-goating various family members, or labelling a family member according to a particular time or event in the past, and not really allowing them to forget it. Sometimes this feels hurtful and is hard to handle. Instead, think about how you would normally react; and honestly reflect on your own role in sustaining this tricky dynamic. Is there a different way you could react, that would suit you better, that is assertive without being aggressive? Tip #4 Escape If it is really getting too much when you are hosting, people are generally so otherwise occupied on Christmas Day and thereabouts, that it is relatively easy to mention a chore that needs to be done, or something that needs to be seen to – while you escape to your bedroom and take a breather. Lie down on the bed – put a favourite song on or do a quick meditation! Tip #5 Down time When the day is over (and you have congratulated yourself on managing the day, albeit with a few hiccups), take some time out. Try to resist the urge to pack in lots of events together, even if others are pressurising you to do so. Even better, outsource a picnic or similar, so that you can control your entry and exit, according to how your energy is during this time. Merry Christmas from all of us at Burleigh Heads Psychology and Relationship Clinic!

  • Part 1 - Five tips to manage those festive triggers - by Karen Holmes

    It’s not uncommon to get emotionally triggered during the festive season but there are ways we can manage this better. As the Christmas break looms, you might already be feeling stressed: you have sooo much to do, but even more so how are you going to cope seeing your mother-in-law/aunt/father during this time? Last year you felt exhausted from the tension. The good news is that there are ways to respond rather than react to these triggers. One of the most common refrains from clients around this time of year is how to manage difficult family members and relatives at big, festive get togethers. Sometimes they are relatives you don’t see very often but “tradition states” you see them on Christmas Day. It’s not always easy to get out of arrangements when multiple people are involved, so it can be about working within these limitations. Things to remind yourself: Tip #1 Their behaviour, usually, is about them – not you It can be good to remind yourself of this, while you are breathing deeply for what feels like the umpteenth time that day. You’ve always suspected Auntie Pat is a deeply unhappy person, so maybe her negative comments are more about her and how she is feeling, rather than personally directed at you. Tip #2 Plan ahead It’s all about strategy – have you and your partner or someone else you trust planned how you will manage Great Uncle Joe’s infamous passive aggressive comments? Can someone laugh it off, or change the topic quickly? Failing that, does he need to be taken aside and gently reminded today is not the day for his grievances from the past…. Stay tuned for next week with tip 3 - 4 and 5 🎄

  • Understanding Core Values

    Do you have an awareness of what your personal core values are? Understanding your core values is like having insight into your own internal moral compass. It is a set of fundamental principles which govern ones life when making decisions, building relationships and solving problems. When we find ourselves in emotional distress or in situations which are not ideal it can often be attributable to one of your core values being compromised. For this reason it can be beneficial to understand what your core values are. To find your core values it is helpful to make a list of which values you can not compromise on, to define what they mean to you and attach behaviours which correspond with them. These behaviours then become a guide for you to live life according to your moral compass and can lead to greater self-awareness, achieving career aspirations and relationship goals. If you would like help discovering your values please get in touch with Kylie at BHP&RC.

  • Attachment Injuries in adults

    Attachment injuries refer to emotional wounds or disruptions in the attachment bond between a child and their primary caregiver. These injuries can have lasting effects on an individual's emotional and psychological well-being. They typically occur during critical developmental periods, often in early childhood, when the child is forming their sense of trust, security, and self-esteem. Attachment injuries can take various forms. Physical or emotional neglect, abuse, inconsistency in caregiving, or separations from caregivers can all contribute to attachment injuries. The impact of these injuries can manifest in different ways, including difficulty forming healthy relationships, low self-esteem, anxiety, depression, and a lack of trust in others. Understanding attachment injuries is crucial because they have far-reaching consequences throughout a person's life. They can influence their ability to connect with others, manage stress, and regulate their emotions. Therapy and interventions can help individuals heal from attachment injuries, learn to build healthy relationships, and develop a more secure attachment style. Recognising and addressing these injuries is essential for promoting emotional well-being and healthy connections with others.

  • Please do not Wait

    Waiting to seek counselling when you have a problem may seem like a common inclination, but there are compelling reasons why it's not always advisable. First and foremost, addressing issues promptly can prevent them from escalating. Problems left unattended often grow in complexity, making them more challenging to resolve later on. Seeking counselling early can help you identify and address issues when they are still manageable, potentially leading to quicker and more effective solutions. Moreover, delaying counselling may lead to emotional and mental distress. Problems like anxiety, depression, or relationship conflicts can take a toll on your well-being, affecting your overall quality of life. Seeking support sooner can help alleviate these emotional burdens and improve your mental health. Counselling also provides a safe and supportive environment to explore and understand your concerns. By waiting, you might unintentionally reinforce negative thought patterns or behaviours, making it harder to break free from them. In essence, waiting to get counselling when you have a problem can exacerbate issues, harm your mental health, and delay your path to recovery. Seeking help early empowers you to proactively address challenges and work towards a happier, healthier future. Don't hesitate to reach out to a qualified therapist or counsellor when you need support; your well-being is worth it.

  • Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) at Burleigh Heads Psychology & Relationship Clinic

    Our psychologists and Counsellors at BHP & RC offer the specialisation of individual psychology, which focuses on understanding and addressing the unique psychological needs and experiences of individual clients. Therapists in this field work closely with clients to provide personalised therapy, assessment, and support to help them navigate their specific challenges and goals. One avenue of therapy is Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) which is used to treat various issues including, anxiety, depression and stress. ACT focuses on helping individuals accept their thoughts and feelings rather than trying to block, change or eliminate them. ACT encourages a commitment to action behaviour change that aligns with one’s values and goals. ACT promotes psychological flexibility to improve overall well-being by combining mindfulness and behavioural strategies. Is there something specific you'd like to know about individual psychology? Contact Kylie-Jo on 5576 2633 to help you find your therapist. .

  • How is your relationship with yourself?

    By Julie Mclachlan - Psychologist at Burleigh Heads Psychology & Relationship Clinic I often find myself asking people ‘are you hard on yourself?’ and the response is often ‘yes’. There are many reasons we can become hard on ourselves. Some of these reasons include the way our systems naturally work, or maybe it has developed from messages we received growing up. For some people this is a general day to day way of being - and for others it can happen in certain situations. For example if we think that we have made a mistake or we don’t meet our own standards or when we are compare ourselves to others (and decide that we are not as good at something as others). We can really be unkind to ourselves and research has shown that this can actually make our experience of challenges even more difficult. There is another way… Cultivating a healthy relationship with ourselves is important to our wellbeing. This involves nurturing a deep understanding and acceptance of our own thoughts, feelings, strengths and challenges. As well as developing a deep compassion for ourselves as we go through challenging experiences. What would it be like to really support ourselves in challenging moments, like we would support a good friend? To understand ourselves, to look after ourselves, support ourselves and to take action that is in line with our values and needs? Research shows many benefits from supporting ourselves in this way including navigating life’s challenges with greater ease and reduced mental health challenges (such as anxiety, depression, stress). If you would like to know more please contact Julie through our website

  • How weather affects emotions

    Weather has a profound impact on human emotions and overall mood, acting as a silent orchestrator of our daily experiences. The interplay between meteorological conditions and our psychological well-being has been a subject of fascination for centuries. Research consistently highlights how shifts in weather patterns can significantly influence our emotions, from the bright warmth of a sunny day to the gloomy dampness of a rainy afternoon. Sunlight, a critical element of weather, plays a pivotal role in regulating our mood. The abundance of sunlight is associated with the release of serotonin, often referred to as the "feel-good" hormone. Exposure to sunlight triggers an increase in serotonin levels, contributing to feelings of happiness and contentment. Conversely, prolonged periods of cloudy and overcast weather can lead to a decrease in serotonin production, potentially causing feelings of sadness and lethargy, a phenomenon commonly known as seasonal affective disorder (SAD). Rainfall, another aspect of weather, can also have a profound effect on our emotional state. The sound of raindrops pattering against windows and the scent of wet earth can evoke a range of emotions, from coziness and nostalgia to introspection. Rain can bring about a sense of relaxation and calmness, creating an opportunity for introspection and a break from the hustle and bustle of daily life. However, excessive rain or prolonged periods of dreary weather might lead to feelings of isolation and melancholy. Temperature variations contribute to the weather-mood relationship as well. Cold weather often encourages indoor activities and social isolation, potentially leading to feelings of loneliness. On the other hand, warm and pleasant weather tends to promote outdoor activities, social interactions, and a generally more positive outlook. The physiological impact of temperature on the body, such as the constriction or dilation of blood vessels, can further influence our emotional responses. In essence, the connection between weather and mood is a complex interplay of biology, psychology, and personal experiences. While it's important to recognise that individuals may respond differently to various weather conditions, there's no denying that the weather's capricious nature holds a significant sway over our emotional landscape, shaping our daily perceptions and interactions with the world around us.

  • Boosting Self Esteem

    Self-esteem is the subjective evaluation of one's own worth, abilities, and value. It reflects a person's overall sense of confidence and belief in their capabilities. Healthy self-esteem contributes to positive mental well-being and interpersonal interactions, while low self-esteem can lead to self-doubt and emotional challenges. Boosting self-esteem involves developing a positive and realistic perception of oneself. Here are some strategies that can help: 1. Practice self-compassion: Treat yourself with kindness and understanding, just as you would a close friend. Acknowledge your strengths and achievements, and be gentle with yourself when faced with setbacks or failures. 2. Challenge negative self-talk: Identify negative thoughts and replace them with more positive and realistic ones. Focus on your strengths, accomplishments, and positive qualities. Reframe self-critical thoughts into more constructive and empowering statements. 3. Set realistic goals: Set achievable goals that align with your values and interests. Break larger goals into smaller, manageable steps to build a sense of accomplishment and self-confidence. 4. Take care of yourself: Prioritise self-care by engaging in activities that nourish your physical, mental, and emotional well-being. This includes getting enough sleep, eating nutritious foods, exercising regularly, and engaging in hobbies or activities that bring you joy and fulfilment. 5. Surround yourself with positivity: Surround yourself with supportive and encouraging people who uplift and validate you. Minimise contact with individuals who bring you down or undermine your self-esteem. 6. Celebrate your successes: Acknowledge and celebrate your accomplishments, no matter how small they may seem. Take time to reflect on your achievements and give yourself credit for your efforts. 7. Seek professional help if needed: If low self-esteem significantly impacts your daily life and well-being, consider seeking support from a therapist or counsellor. They can provide guidance and tools to help you work through underlying issues and develop healthier self-esteem. Remember, building self-esteem takes time and effort. Be patient and compassionate with yourself as you embark on this journey of self-growth and self-acceptance.

  • Trust is Built with Intention

    The building of trust is not instantaneous in relationships, it is built slowly over time through small acts of 'turning towards' each other, being there for your partner, expressing compassion and empathy for one another’s feelings. Interestingly, in relationships many conflicts concern the defining and building of trust, ‘are you there for me when I call, when I am worried, upsetting, hurt or angry’. When couples can lean into each other with understanding and gentleness, even when negative emotions are expressed, trust is built. Whilst new relationships may believe trust is strong from the start it can quickly evaporate when couple 'turn away' from each and negative conflict escalates. Trust is grown by small moments of being there for your partner in good times but most importantly when negative emotion is expressed. ‘When you are in pain, feeling sad or angry - my world stops, and I try to understand what is happening for you’. Here is a great communication model that helps couples create a safe, positive and trust building connection. The word “ATTUNE” is actually an acronym that stands for six processes: A - Awareness of one’s partner’s pain T - Tolerance that there are always two valid viewpoints in any negative emotions T - Turning Toward one partner’s need U - trying to Understand your partner N - Non-defensive listening E - Empathy

  • What is Anxiety?

    Burleigh Heads Psychology Clinic have experience Psychologist specialising in the treatment of Anxiety. So, what is Anxiety? it is a psychological and physiological response characterised by feelings of worry, fear, and unease. It can manifest as racing thoughts, physical symptoms like rapid heartbeat and sweating, and avoidance behaviours. Anxiety is a common human experience and can range from mild to severe, impacting daily functioning and well-being. Anxiety management involves a multi-faceted approach to reduce and cope with anxiety symptoms. It encompasses strategies such as deep breathing, relaxation techniques, challenging negative thoughts, regular exercise, maintaining a healthy lifestyle, seeking support from others, practicing mindfulness and meditation, limiting stress triggers, and utilising therapy or counselling. By implementing these techniques, individuals can gain control over their anxiety and improve their overall well-being. It's important to remember that managing anxiety is a personalised journey, and what works for one person may not work for another. Finding a combination of strategies that suits one's needs is crucial for effective anxiety management.

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